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neurological dryer lint

dirty deeds... and the dunderchief


gutters filled with black debris


yes, you!

are you tired of your browser working properly?!?

sick of stability and acceptable performance?!?!

bored with keyboard shortcuts that make rational sense?!?

then what you need is safari for windows! combine the gaudy interface of the horrendous mac browser with the frustrating, molasses-in-january performance of itunes for windows (or any apple software product for that matter)! finally, there's a browser for windows that's worse than Internet Explorer!



for this post

Blogger B-Call Says:

hey, back off.
my itunes for windows works just fine.

Blogger scott d Says:

LOL. i knew there was some infomercial sarcasm somewhere within you. good work.

Blogger ryanham Says:

Why did I initially think you were quoting Pink Floyd?

"Stand still, laddy!"

Blogger Simon Says:

What iTunes are you using that works just fine? Oh wait, you're using a slow-ass computer anyway so you don't notices...

Yeah, I don't understand why anyone would want to use Safari. I've tried it a few times on Sarah's Mac, and I can't do crap! It's pretty lame. I still can't get over the no right click on the Mac! I've been using iMovie to make videos for club, and I love the software, but it pisses me off so much because you can't right click to do all the obvious stuff! Argh!

Blogger Justin Hall Says:

hers might support their 'hidden' right-click: with two fingers on the trackpad (or holding down CTRL) you can click and get a right-click context menu.

i've thought for a while about modding my macbook, cutting the trackpad button in half and wiring it so that the ctrl button is activated every time i click the right button. wonder if it's been done before.

Blogger ryanham Says:

Just buy an external 2 or 3 button mouse, people! Right-click functionality exists, you just have to have a mouse with enough buttons!

Blogger Justin Hall Says:

external mouse while at a desk = great

external mouse while on the couch w/my laptop actually on my lap = annoying

everyone uses the right-click functionality in their OS anyway... i cannot figure out why apple doesn't just suck it up and put it in their products! besides the obvious stubborn pride...

Blogger Simon Says:

Yeah, I'm sure it has the ctrl button feature, but it's extra annoying to have to reach over and hit a button on the keyboard just to right click.

Anonymous Artie Says:

You're all crazy. As a developer, Safari rocks. IE is the bane of my existence. Easy to use? Try reading through that miles-long list of check boxes under tools or something. iTunes may run slow, but you can't seriously consider anything by Microsoft as an alternative.

Gaudy? Have you looked at IE? Everyone I know has like 300 buttons along the top. Right now I have a back, next, reload, address bar, google search and post to del.icio.us and my del.icio.us buttons along the top. That's it. Plus full RSS support.

Cntrl-clicking isn't that bad. I have a Thinkpad at my desk, and the track pad on it sucks as does the little erasor thing on the keyboard. Neither are engineered to stay out the way while I type. I'm constantly hitting the click button on the track pad whenever I try to hit "space". Say what you will about Apple's cost, but there's no denying that their design (both UI and industrial) more than makes up for it when you're a professional user. The only thing I miss out on is a handful of MS development tools that aren't ported, but I can remote desktop into other machines to use that (or run Bootcamp or something like it if my IT dept. let me have my way).

Although, Firefox is better than 'em both. The plug-ins or extensions or whatever they call 'em are awesome.

Anonymous Artie Says:

I mean seriously. How can you compare this to Vista? Look at the Time Machine app. Sure, it's just a backup app, but look how usable it is! There's another example of where great UI design does more than just make pretty pictures, it makes something usable by more people. Safari comes from the same place.

Blogger Simon Says:

Yeah I'm pretty sure most intelligent people are using Firefox by now.

Blogger Justin Hall Says:

i'm not talking OS X vs. Vista on this one. and i'm not really talking IE vs. Safari - both are equally terrible IMHO, the only thing that makes Safari worse on Windows is its complete lack of stability and performance, which (at its current release, and likely will be at its final) is worse than IE, and that's saying something.

and not to get into any kind of holy war... but from the standpoint of a technical person, i like having lots of options (a mile long list of checkboxes) in an application. give me more choice, not less. the average dumb end user doesn't care, either, they rarely venture into the browser's preferences - there's no need, unless directed by a tech support person who walks them through it - their browser works just fine without ever needing to modify any options. they just open and surf to americalidol.com and never think twice.

firefox FTW.

Anonymous Artie Says:

I haven't installed it yet (but plan to when I have some down time), but let's remember a key rule about all Apple products: Version 1.0 is really a beta. The first iPod was a brick assembled by a team of engineers in like 2 weeks. The first version of their laptops always have weird issues (remember the color rubbing off yours JW?). Etc. So, yeah, I'm sure that this version of Safari will be a bit quirky, but you have to admit it's a wise move for Apple (hook people on their stuff like iPod and iTunes have) and it's a good move for competition in the browser market (more pressure on MS to make a compliant browser). Oh, and we, the consumers, get even more options. How can you complain?

As for options, in my experience, you're wrong. The difference between MS and Apple apps (and their OS for that matter) is that MS shows you all the options up front. This is great if you know exactly what you're looking for using their taxonomy of where it should be. This sucks if you have a lot of stuff and aren't sure where it is (on my PC at home, I have so many apps that if I hit "all programs" or whatever under start, the list completely fills the screen horizontally and vertically and I loose all context of where I'm at and feel overwhelmed). Apple, on the other hand, hides options that you don't use very often. Granted, you have to know there taxonomy too. From the average end user, I think Apple's approach wins.

As for keyboard shortcuts, sorry, but Safari makes a lot of sense. A new tab is command-t. Forward and back are command-[ and command-]. Address bar is the same quick key as every "info" pane in OSX, command-i. New window is command-n. Open is command-o. Pretty intuitive if you ask me.

Blogger Simon Says:

fecal matter

Blogger Justin Hall Says:

and to move between tabs is ctrl-tab, like every other app in windows, right?

nope. it's ctrl-shift-}, makes a whole lot of sense. you also can't activate links with Enter like you can in firefox. jump to the search box with options-apple-F (couldn't be ctrl-shift-F and be consistent, could you, apple?) you can't even change the search engine in the search box with the keyboard (option-up and down in firefox). like every other apple product, it's made to be used almost exclusively with the mouse.

we didn't need another browser in windows. we certainly didn't need another one that uses more resources than IE and firefox combined. this is v3 of safari, btw, if they can't get their apps to work reasonably well in another OS, they need to stop releasing them for other OS's - it just makes them look bad.

i don't think apple is going to win anyone over with safari - most mac users don't like it anyway from what i read, i certainly don't think anyone is going to be switching, besides designer guys like you who need to see what their site looks like.

artie - you and i have always disagreed on making apps simpler and giving them more options. i doubt that will change anytime soon :) i know how much you love apps like iPhoto - because of how intuitive they are, how they guide a user to the simple tasks. i'm a person that knows what he wants to do walking into an app, though, if i can't find those options easily (i.e. if they are hidden, like they are in iPhoto) it drives me nuts. i think they're made for a different type of user. nothing wrong with that!

Anonymous Artie Says:

Ehh, good points. I just think the vast majority of folks would be much happier on a Mac than on a PC. On a Mac, it's an ecosystem (everything talks to everything else). On a PC, every app is a silo. On a Mac, options you don't need everyday don't take up precious space on the screen. On a Mac, fun, easy to use creative software ships free or cheap (compare iMovie to Windows Movie Maker, Garage Band to...???, iPhoto to ???).

Honestly, you, nor I, are the Safari market. We're Firefox's. Everyone using Explorere is Safari's. Good luck Apple. Oh, and I meant that Safari on PC is Apples v1, not the current browser on a Mac.

Finally, quick way of adding right click to your Mac track pad. Works great and is actually more intuitive than a right click! Try it, you'll like it:

Anonymous Artie Says:

That URL got truncated. Here's it is all tinyified:


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